Trust Him with all you have.

Woman intuition can lead you if you don't let your heart get in the way.

So a little while back I was feeling some major attacks.  My husband was seeing a physical therapist and something just took hold of my spirit and ran with it.  I have complete trust in my husband but something in my gut kept insisting that something wasn't right.  It brought me to tears and down on my knees.  I  tried talking about it but my poor husband didn't get it, there was no cause to the effect I was feeling.

Sometimes all you really can do is pray and TRUST.  But when you don't know what to pray it can be hard and you end up with very selfish prayers that aren't really honoring God or your husband in the outcome.  So feeling lost and confused I picked up this prayer book I borrowed from a friend.  The thing I love about it is that several of the prayers are marked.  I prayed over temptations, wisdom, his work, protection of his mind, healing of his body.  All those things along with the scriptures that went with them.  It was funny the first time I did the first prayer I had marked and then the one right before it (or so I thought) because the next time as I turn to the prayer before the card it was a different one and more suited as well.  That happened at least 3 times.

After I started my prayers daily every morning for the most part, a peace came over me that I was so thirsty for.  I know look back and can see how silly that whole thing must have seemed.  But some other things happened as I prayed.  My husband started coming to a marriage group that I had been going to for a few weeks, he listened to scripture with me and even started a couples devotion with me.  Our time together is so awesome that it feels as if we were just married although a lot more tired (3 little ones will do that to you).

If I would have just followed my heart, it would have led to fights and accusations that would have pushed us farther apart and who knows where.  Seeking God and trusting Him with my marriage and my husband, we were able to grow in so much more.  I want to have not just a purposeful life but a very purposeful marriage.  This isn't just someone I live with my someone I choose to spend the rest of my life with, the honor and adore.   This bond needs to grow and strengthen and to do so needs constant attention and work.  How blessed I am by our great Lord and the gifts he has given.

stay out ofthe way

I love my husband so much and it pains me to see him make decisions that are contrary to the way we want to live.  As Paul says I want one thing but I do the other.  Ok, I want to do good but I inherently screw up.  Well I have seen so much growth spiritually in my husband over the years and if there is one thing that is consistent with that growth it's that I stay out if the way.  I pray with, over, and for him but desperately try not to suggest what he needs to do.

Last October he got baptized and instantly I could see the attack that was on him. I tried to insist but he didn't see it and I tried to talk of spiritual matters that he didn't see/feel yet.  So I stopped, it seems that the more I press and event speek of spiritual things the farther he gets. But today he went up for prayer on his own without my suggesting or really understanding what was going on.  He was asking for prayer over his spiritual dedication.

Pastor Mike Johnson had been talking about renewing that new Christian "smell" renewing that passion we once had for him.  I didn't even know that that would hit him, all I did was pray the spirit would speak to him, touch him lift him up during our worship time.  Guess it took hold.  He is without a doubt the most amazing man I have or will ever know.  That I am sure of.

please enjoy the view with me

If there was one thing I wish my husband understood about me more it would be how much I long to have him by my side as we sit outside and enjoy, marvel, become refreshed by Gods beauty. I love to sit outside and just breath thefresh air as we look up at the stars or snuggle by a river and watch how lovely it all is. Hopefuly we will get a chance this summer when we go to the beach. I love my man with all my heart and I know we have differeny interests. I just wish he could share this moment with me. He wants me to sit and watch a movie with him well I want him to sit and enjoy the stars with me. Hum someday, guess I'll treasute the moment thatmuch more when it happens.

Bad moods snow ball

Did it ever cross your mind that maybe your spouse is just in a bad mood and it may have nothing at all to do with you.  Oh we can have a funk but rarely do we except it from anybody else.  Sometimes a bad mood can really hurt someone, especially if your 6 months pregnant and really emotional anyways.  Remember those two little words that can mean the world if they are said right, usually with a hug and a kiss.  I'm sorry can speak volumes.  Explaining "I was just in a bad mood, not really sure why, just things weren't going the way I wanted" helps the forgiveness train go a long way.

Always remember to apologies.  Even if it seems that technically you did nothing wrong.  You may have lashed out at someone for something really small because your spouse was unhappy (and you think it's because of you.)  Usually our kids suffer but it can be anyone around us.  Let us remember to have a grateful heart at all times.  And always humble yourself to those you may have walked over in the process of venting your frustrations.

I am blessed

Preparing for the possibilities of some major financial short comings I was discussing with my husband if worst comes to worst. I mentioned that he could always bunk with his brothers and the kids and I could stay with my uncle until we got things back under control.

I was astonished at the response. He stopped playing his game which usually takes quite a feet to do. Looks up at me and shakes his head. I in shock ponder and ask what? I just want some sort of plan for just in case. He comes back and sais that no matter what we will not be separated. Trust in God and all will be ok. He was really offended at the thought that I wouldn't be at his side physically as well as mentally.

That's the sort of devotion that keeps me going, knowing that no matter what happens we'll always have each other through tick and thin, riches and poverty we have each other. Isn't it that sort of commitment that we made when we were married but you don't stop and think about what it would cost you until the time comes and when your unsure of where to turn you can turn to each other.

The Fear of the Lord - John Bevere

Pg 21:
"... and changed the glory of the incorruptible God into an image made like corruptible man. - Romans 1:23
Again e see the one true God's glorious image reduced. This time it is not to a calf but rather to the image of corruptible man. Israel was surrounded by a society that worshiped golden images in the likenesses of animals and insects. The modern-day curch is surrounded by a culture that worships man. ... We have served God in the image we have made."

Wow the idea that we have attempted to make God over in our image and pick and choose what we want from him, so instead of worshiping and believing in our Lord and Savior we're doing such to another entity that we completely made up. Best make sure your understandings and beliefs come straight from the good book.

Love is not enough

Love is not enough. It must be the foundation, the cornerstone - but not the complete structure. It is much too pliable, too yielding.
Bette Davis